Midlife, The Third Chapter of Life Part III:
Midlife:
Remember, Midlife is the central period of a person’s life, spanning from age 40 to age 65. It can be a stressful time, as many people come to feel discontented and restless as they struggle with aging, mortality, and holding onto a sense of purpose.
In Midlife, The Third Chapter of Life Part III, we will be digging deeper into the aspects of feeling discontented and restless while struggling with aging, mortality, and holding onto a sense of purpose.
- discontented
- restless while struggling with
- aging
- mortality
- sense of purpose
Discontented:
Discontented- dissatisfied, especially with ones circumstances.
This discontentment can show it’s ugly side at different times and during different situations in midlife. I often sit and wonder is it an event that triggers our dissatisfaction, or certain words that someone spoke to us at an unexpected time in life?
For example, second and third marriages, did you jump in to it because of the fear of being alone?
Did you set some goals or boundaries so the next one worked better or are you reliving what made you escape in the first place?
These questions crossed my mind when a woman at work said you are still young, will you date again someday or cut everyone off? I truly did not have a clear answer for her.
As I reflected on my day later on, I thought about the questions I would want answered before I attempt to give this heart away again.
My midlife discontentment showed itself after the last words my mother spoke to me were, “you need to start living, you have taken care of everyone for to many years.” I thought about her words days after Her Journey Was Complete.
Restless:
Restless while struggling with aging, mortality, and holding onto a sense of purpose, is the next have of midlife description. As I said her words stayed with me for days. Especially after living out the words in the verse below, I knew setting boundaries were the best way to face the possibility of sharing my heart again.
She laid her heart and soul right in your hands
And you stole her every dream, and you crushed her plans
She never even knew she had a choice, and that's what happens
When the only voice she hears is telling her she can't
Speaking about a parents death, especially a father’s death. For most of us that is the person we counted on for advice or to fix a situation. I believe that is when we struggle with aging and mortality and possibly a form of depression we never thought lived inside of us. I speak from experience, although I am a naturally quiet person, I am also a optimistic person.
The type of depression I am referring to is suicidal thoughts, no I did not have the guts to take my life, but coming home on the highway every night for months after my father’s death, I would wish someone came across the media.
I did of course seek help with counseling and can still proudly say at age fifty-four I do not need prescriptions to make life happy and positive.
There are some interesting articles about the death of a father and the effects on adult children…
On the Death of My Father… mentions that there are Four ways a men deals with his father’s death. If one of these four ways is a part of your story maybe someone special to you would like to hear the story?
In the article titled… The Death of a Parent Affects Even Grown Children Psychologically and Physically it mentions that “Husbands can best support their wives by listening,” Manly says. “Men often feel helpless in the face of their wives’ emotions, and they want to fix the situation. A husband can do far more good by sitting with his wife, listening to her, holding her hand, taking her for walks, and — if she desires — visiting the burial site.”
Holding onto a sense of purpose:
How are you doing with holding onto your sense of purpose?
Have you figured out what is keeping you from the sense of purpose?
I believe this is why I have adopted the quote… “a dead battery can not jump another dead battery” as my life motto for 2021.
As I begin to keep my promise to mom, as I head towards my Third Chapter of Life… I realize I can do without negativity and silence and people using the words ” can’t be done” when I need a sense of inspiration and encouragement.
Conclusion:
They have labeled midlife as the central period of a person’s life, spanning from age 40 to age 65. It can be a stressful time, as many people come to feel discontented and restless as they struggle with aging, mortality, and holding onto a sense of purpose.
We broke down each section and shared life experiences. Now it is your turn, comment below the following…
When did your discontentment show itself?
Men do you agree that there are only four ways a man deals with his father’s death?
Ladies have you experienced a husband listening about the loss?
Next time:
Join me next time for part four of Midlife, The Third Chapter of Life
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